Tag Archive | Quotes

On the Playground

There’s a song on my iPod that keeps popping up that I really like because of the bass line, but also because of the lyrics. It says “I warned you, you didn’t believe me. I warned you & now you’re caught. There’s some people that you just can’t trust. Some people talk way too much. Take my advice & listen up. Don’t be a fool like the rest of us.”

I also like this song because I can relate to the lyrics. It can go both ways though. I can see myself as both the good-guy & bad-guy in this song.

I’ve always had a dark side, but the good side is usually what ruled & guided me. I think I’ve gone out of balance in the last few years though. I don’t even trust myself sometimes & I certainly don’t expect anyone else to trust me. How do I get back to the light? How do I stop being what I despise, a hypocrite? This probably sounds ridiculous coming from a preacher’s kid because i’m supposed to already know the answer. That doesn’t mean it’s any easier or the how-to part is any clearer though.

Just some late night contemplations. No juicy confession or anything this time. There’s really nothing to confess today other than I ate too many Thanksgiving leftovers and I got caught in a lie.

I hope all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your families. Since I completely avoided mine, i’m in the dog house i’m afraid. Nothing beats being the black sheep of the family.

Really? Yes, really.

Ok, so after my last post yesterday, I got a text from my “friend with benefits” saying that he was “going out on a limb here” and he told me that he thought he was falling in love with me.  Um, ok.  His timing is very odd.  I’ve known and been seeing the guy for nine months and he’s just now telling me this why?  I don’t have a clue, but all it does is confuse me further.

Honestly, I’m not the type that enjoys hurting other people, even if it’s for revenge purposes.  I like to stay friendly with the guys that I’ve dated or had relationships with.  I don’t want to hate anyone, even though I probably should at times, especially the ones that cheated on me.

The only difference with this guy, the reason why I’m even still seeing him after him admitting cheating, is that I really do like him and so does my family.  Now that is a first.  My family usually hates everyone I date, or at least the ones that they have met.  Sometimes they didn’t even have to meet the guys to know that they didn’t like them.  My sister is a staunch believer that all men are lying cheating assholes.  I try to give men the benefit of the doubt and trust them until they give me reason not to, but over the years they’ve only proved her right.  Fourteen years of sex, dating, relationships, marriages, divorces and all I can say is that I don’t trust any man anymore.  This is a sad thing for me to admit because I do truly love and adore men, but even the great ones are dumb-asses a lot of the time.

All of this makes me wonder about my little brother and nephew.  Will they grow up to be lying cheating assholes also?  God, I hope not.  If they do, then I guess I’ll just have to kick their asses.  No woman should ever be treated the way I, and so many other women, have been treated since the dawn of time.  Women are supposed to be loved and adored.  We are the mothers, sisters, daughters, lovers, wives, girlfriends and the faces of grace, strength and goodness in the world.

“My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute all my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her.”  George Washington

“I have worshipped woman as the living embodiment of the spirit of service and sacrifice.”  Mohandas Gandhi

“What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce.”  Mark Twain

“As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.”  John Lennon