Tag Archive | Moving

Taking out the trash


I have a problem.  A trash problem.  It started about four months ago, when I moved in.  For the first time in over a year I found that it was my responsibility to take out the trash.  Well, that just sucked.

So I devised a plan.  I would take out the trash once a week when I was doing laundry.  I would take it out on my second trip to the laundry room when it was time to put the clothes in the dryer.  The trash bins are behind the laundry room, which is across the yard, next to the pool.

That worked for a while, until I got behind on my laundry.  I only got behind on my laundry because I kept forgetting to go to the bank and get quarters.  Damn quarters.

So as time went on and my trash bag sat in the floor next to the stove, I started having visitors.  Mostly male visitors.  Ok, fine.  They were all male visitors.  Very nice male visitors too.  Because each and every one of them offered to take my trash out for me.  Of course I had to decline, because, you know, pride and all.

I always told them that I was going to take it out in the morning, or later that day.  I never did.  Well, I did occasionally.  This went on for months.

Last night Bacchus came over.  We were sitting at the table talking and somehow the topic of my garbage came up.  Of course he offered to take it out.  I declined.  Then I told him that everyone tries to take out my garbage for me.  He admitted that it did bother him that I always had a bag of garbage sitting there.  I laughed.

He proceeded to grab the bags, yes there were two last night, and asked where the dumpster was.  I told him and he took it out.  When he got back I told him that he had completely fucked up my story.  Now it had an ending.  Or does it?


Happy humping my fellow Oscars!


Welcome Back to the She-Woman Man-Haters Club

50234_5819967270_3386_nWelcome back to the She-Woman Man-Haters Club.  It’s been a long time.  So you thought we’d closed our doors for good?  The only thing closed now is our legs.  Well, maybe not completely closed.  A girl does have needs.

The club has grown lately.  Within the past month alone I know of three other couples who have split up.  So I’d like to welcome our newest members to the She-Woman Man-Haters Club.

The most recent couple to break us is my sister, Fallen Angel, and the guy she has seen for a few months now, Wascally Rabbit.  A couple of weeks ago she found out through Facebook that he was “in a relationship” with another person.  Of course he had an explanation for this.  He was just helping the poor girl out.  It was just a show for some guy who she was trying to run off.  Notice I didn’t say that it was a good explanation, because after further investigation we found that there was just too much on her profile about WR, tags & such, for it to be a ploy to scare off another guy.  WR is full of shit.

So after giving WR plenty of chances to correct the situation and him not doing so, my sister asked me to send the girl a message on Facebook and find out if it was true.  So I sent her a very polite message telling her the situation and letting her know that I was just concerned that my sister might be dating a lying cheating piece of shit.  Personally I would want to know if my man was dating someone else on the side, especially if we were living together and supposedly a monogamous couple.

Horny HeartI sent the message around 2:30 pm today.  My sister and I waited, but I received no reply.  WR wasn’t replying to my sister’s texts.  When she got off work she tried to call him and he sent the call straight to voicemail.  That seemed a little odd.  Then he finally answered her call and told her that he was going hunting tonight.  Not unusual for a redneck, but unusual for a guy that was just offered a booty call.  You see, Fallen Angel was trying her best to set a trap of her own.

So as far as we know right now, his other girlfriend probably got my message and is now chewing him a new asshole, or at least we hope that’s what’s happening.  I’d also like to add that I told her that he can burn in hell with the rest of the lying cheating assholes out there.  (Insert sweet southern smile & bat eyelashes here.)

It seems that spring is in the air, and you know what that means.  It’s time for men to cheat and/or break up with the women who love them, leaving us women to shed tears, then harden our hearts, then open our legs to someone who may not be date-able but who is definitely fuck-able.  As the Preacher’s Daughter’s like to say, “Next!” and my favorite is, “The best way to get over a man is to get on top of another one.”

It amazes me that once I regain my single status, the men start coming at me from all directions, or so it seems.  It’s probably just that I’ve been so enamored with Teacher that I just ignored all the other men.  Not that I have a problem with receiving offers, mind you, but it can be a bit overwhelming when just coming out of a long-term monogamous relationship.

The best thing to come out of all this is that I’m finally getting my own little apartment.  I’ll be single and living alone for the first time in a very, very long time.  I’m very excited about all the possibilities.  Shit, if I choose to, I could have a different man over for some “sweet tea” every week.  Wouldn’t that be lovely?  I’d better stock up on tea.

We’ll have to see about that though.  I’m still in the “I hate men” phase of the post break-up emotional roller coaster ride.  I think I should let things follow their natural course this time and not rush into anything.  That’s what always gets me into trouble anyway.  So no rushing into anything serious, and as always…

Happy humping!  (Meeting adjourned.)


Supermoons, bitches, and wheelchairs

montrealWow.  What a month.  First of all, Bulldog quit.  Bulldog was the guy who replaced Hamster about a month and a half ago.  I can’t say I was too surprised to find out that he had found a better job and was moving on.  I also can’t blame him.  Hopefully I’ll be following him out soon.  Secondly, Bossman hired another guy who quit the day before he was scheduled to start.  Lastly, I found out this week that yet another new hire turned in his notice.  He started on Monday.  Bossman is not having the best of luck when it comes to keeping employees.  Sadly to say, for him at least, I will be leaving soon too.

I had a second interview with that company, but still haven’t heard anything.  I’m still checking out other job leads in the mean time.  Also, I thought I had found a cheaper apartment, which would have allowed me to move sooner, but that fell through.  It’s ok though, because that first apartment is still available. 🙂  Now if I can just save enough cash for the rent & deposit I should be ready to move.

Speaking of saving cash…my sister told me Monday that she’s moving next week.  The Preacher is coming down to help her move.  All I can say is thank God!  She’s been driving me crazy.  The house is a disaster area, her dogs brought fleas into the house (and they only seem to bite me and Little Bubba, not my sister), and between paying the power and water bills by myself I haven’t had any money left over to save for my move.

I got a call yesterday about another job prospect.  I’ve got an interview on Monday.  Maybe I’ll actually get this one.  In the mean time I’m taking advantage of having a week of paid vacation.  I scheduled it over a month ago in the hopes that Teacher and I would get to go somewhere.  It turns out that he’s Continue reading

Married Manwhore: Not so different from single Manwhore

imagesLast Sunday I received an email from Manwhore.  It said, “I’m in Mississippi…You wanna see me tonight?”  Two hours later when I had not replied, he sent me another email.  It said, “You could at least email me back…my number is ***-***-**** now…new number.”   I still did not reply.

How is it that a man, barely married six months, can so easily cheat on his wife – the so-called “love of his life”?  Well, I know how.  He’s a douche-bag of epic proportions.  Actually I’m very proud of myself for even saying that.  There was a time when I was in total denial about that, but no more.  Also, I’m not trying to harp on Manwhore, or keep dredging up the past, but when he refuses to stop contacting me it becomes difficult.

Since he decided to be a cheating whoring dick and email me last weekend, I checked out his Facebook profile.  Of course I was not surprised by what I found.  Two weeks ago he posted, “I just wanna tell my wife that I Love Her and Miss her so much…I can’t wait till June 5th when you get moved down in our New House…”  That is just a prime example of Manwhore being his true self.  Telling his wife how much he loves & misses her one day, and then trying to fuck me the next.  God only knows how many women he’ll fuck before June 5th.

rottenecard_83664540_2cg7fdfh22Should I feel sorry for her?  Nope.  Why not?  Because she knows exactly what kind of lying cheating whore he is, and yet she still married him.  Who knows?  Maybe she’s the same way and is just as much of a whore as he is.  Nah…she’s just a gold-digger.

I’m not sure what the point of this point started out being, but I started it one morning this past week and now it’s Saturday morning and I’ve lost my train of thought.  Mainly because I just got some great news this week.  I got a callback for that job that I interviewed for on Tuesday!  Yay!  They asked me to come back in this coming Tuesday to interview with the managers.  Sounds to me like I’ve actually got a chance of getting the job. 🙂

Also, after my interview last Tuesday, I went and looked at an apartment that is only one block away from that company’s office!  It would be so perfect.  I could walk to work, and it’s just my style…a little bohemian mixed with a little urban, oh, and it’s right above the bar/restaurant where Teacher performs a lot!  How perfect is that!  LOL

even-though-highly-educated-graduation-ecard-someecardsToday I’m at work counting down the hours until Teacher comes to whisk me away.  Oh, I almost forgot to tell you about Bossman.  Last weekend he had a motorcycle accident and has been in the hospital all week.  He’s home now, but he’s still recovering from a lot of broken bones.  I have no idea when he’ll be able to come back to work.  I’m glad he’s going to recover, but unfortunately his accident and recovery time is going to make my leaving even more difficult.  It’s not going to hinder my leaving;  it will just make me feel a little guilty leaving my job knowing that they are going to be short-handed.  However, I can’t pass up an opportunity this good, and I sure as hell am not going to miss out on being with Teacher and on getting that apartment.  🙂

So hopefully by next week I’ll be able to give you some great news about the job and the apartment.  So keep your fingers, toes & penises crossed for me!

Happy humping!


Sibling Rivalries: The Bitch is Back

panicI think I’m having a panic attack.  My chest hurts, I’m sweating, it feels like someone is trying to choke me, my head is spinning, and I want to cry.  I guess I should thank my wonderful family for this.  Ever since they arrived this evening it’s been nonstop chaos and noise and tension and stress.  I tried to keep myself busy.  I did my laundry, the dishes, and finally just decided to hide up in my room.  Who knows how long the peace and quiet will last though.  We’ve got a shortage of beds again and I’ll be damned if I end up having to sleep with my sister and nephew again.

My plan of taking them out to dinner tomorrow night was shot to shit as soon as I mentioned it to my aunt.  My sister heard me and said in a snotty tone, “You’d better be saving for a car instead.”  I told her to shut up, and then she said something about me using her truck (the one I bought her) to get to work.  Considering she’s not working now and I’m the one with a full-time paying job, I think it’s in both our best interest for me to actually go to work.

steweyAfter that little comment though, I decided that instead of getting into a fight with her in front of my mom, aunt, little brother and nephew, I’d just not say anything else.  There’s nothing I can say anyway that would make her stop being such a selfish bitch.

Since I still haven’t found another car, I think I’m just going to call the mechanic Monday and tell him to put a new motor in mine.  At least that way I can get my car back and then get the hell out of this house…permanently.  It’s sad that she’s pushed me to the point where once I get out of here, I probably won’t speak to her for a very long time.  I have no reason to anymore.  All she does is judge, bitch, criticize, and complain about how I choose to live my life.  She’s worse than my parents ever were.

Happy humping!