Tag Archive | Christianity

How to split a church

I don’t write much about church which is probably odd considering that I’m a preacher’s daughter.  However, recent events have led to the church being on my mind a lot lately, much to my dismay.

I’ve mentioned in passing about the Preacher, my mom and little brother moving to another state.  This meant that the Preacher had to leave his small church that he pastored for the past fifteen years.  Even though everyone was sad to see them go, they believed that my dad was following God’s will.  To make sure that the church would be able to continue on, the Preacher asked a few preachers to come and be guest speakers in the weeks before their moving.  Before they moved the church voted on an interim pastor and to keep the Preacher on as overseer until the end of the year.  The main reason for the Preacher staying on as overseer was because the interim pastor would have a 90 day trial period, and the land, church, and loans were all in the Preacher’s name.  So once the interim pastor finished the trial period things would be completely turned over to him.

The interim pastor that the church chose is a young man who has never pastored a church before, but evidently everyone liked him and enjoyed his sermons enough to vote for him.  My family and I have known this young man for about 7 or 8 years.  My sister met him first.  She worked for him as a horse trainer and farm hand for a while.  He was close to her age and he used to come over to my parents’ house and play cards and dominos with me, my sister, and her then boyfriend.  I thought he was a really nice and cute young guy.  My sister had told me that he was a little strange about certain things and kind of a momma’s boy, but he was a good guy overall.

From what I’ve heard and pieced together here’s what happened.  Soon after my parents moved, the interim pastor, Momma’s Boy, went into the church office and started going through the books, the checking account mainly.  First of all, as interim pastor, he was not supposed to be doing this.  The church books are open for anyone to see, but only under the supervision of the pastor, or in this case the overseer, the Preacher.  The Preacher would have gladly shown this information to Momma’s Boy, or anyone else, if he had just asked.

Sometime after Momma’s Boy went through the checkbook he went to one of the older couples in the church, Mr. & Mrs. J, and accused the Preacher of stealing from the church.  By the way, Mr. & Mrs. J are the same ones who ran off the previous pastors because they wanted control over the church.  Right there Momma’s Boy made his second mistake.  He didn’t bother contacting the Preacher and confronting him with this disturbing accusation, he just went straight to Mr. & Mrs. J with his accusations.  From what I’ve heard, the Mrs. J claims to have come to the Preacher’s defense.  What happened after that though, makes me wonder how much she really defended him.

Before I go any further I’d just like to make it clear that the Preacher isn’t perfect.  He’s a man like any other with faults and imperfections.  However, he is not and has never been a thief, and to accuse him of stealing from the church and from God is just ridiculous.  And I’m not just saying that because he’s my father.  I have no grand delusions of my father being a saint or anything.

A few things happened afterwards that really pissed me off and were just wrong.  These supposed Christians were acting like jackasses and stuck-up snobs.

Momma’s Boy, his mother (Mrs. Boss), and Mr. & Mrs. J all got together and called the members of the church that they thought would be easy to control or on their side.  They were planning a church business meeting, but failed to tell all the members of this meeting.  According to the bylaws, when a church business meeting is scheduled, all members should be given at least one months notice.  It is to be listed in the church bulletins, and the Preacher always sent out text messages to everyone in the days leading up to the meeting to make sure that everyone knew about it.  Momma’s Boy and Mr. & Mrs. J completely disregarded the rules and set the meeting up so that only certain people would know about it.  Can you say sneaky, manipulative, and deceitful?  I can.

Helper, the man who has helped the Preacher at the church, at the mission, and has attended the church for the past several years had just gotten through cutting the grass at the church when Mr. J drove up.  Mr. J asked Helper where the old lawn mower was.  He was referring to an old lawn mower that the church had purchased 15+ ago, way before Helper had even started coming to church, and Helper knew nothing about it.  Mr. J then asked Helper about the lawn mower that was on the back of his truck and said that it looked a lot like the one that the church had.  Helper told him that it was his lawn mower that he had bought himself.  Basically the old man was implying that either Helper stole the church’s lawn mower, or that the Preacher had given it to him.  Neither is true.  Now that’s definitely one way to run off a good member of your church.  Insult them by accusing them of stealing a lawn mower.  When in fact, Helper is a faithful member of the church and volunteers to cut the grass for the church…for free.  That’s right, he doesn’t get paid to cut the grass.

Next, the woman who has taught children’s’ church, Mrs. Shorty, was booted out rather abruptly.  Mrs. Boss, bought new material for the children’s’ church program without consulting or asking anyone.  Mrs. Boss then made it her mission to take over the teaching of it.  Mrs. Shorty was told that she would no longer be needed to teach.  Talk about rude.  Mrs. Shorty has been one of the more faithful members and now her and her husband have decided not to go back since they no longer feel welcome there.  Mrs. Shorty was also one of the people who were conveniently left out of the loop when it came to the church business meeting.  She was tipped off however, and did manage to make it to the meeting.  She said that she could definitely tell that she was not wanted there.

According to my sister, who has known both Momma’s Boy and Mrs. Boss for a very long time, Mrs. Boss is a bit of a stuck-up snob with control issues.  It’s becoming more and more clear that Mrs. Boss is trying to weed out the so-called undesirables from her son’s new church.  Unfortunately, most of those “undesirables” have been the most faithful members and contributors in the church for many years.  In the end, they are only harming the church and themselves.

Where has the Preacher been during all of this?  Well, since he’s now two states away, he can’t do much.  He got a call from Mr. J’s son, Little J, and was asked where he got the money that he had contributed to the church.  The Preacher told him that it came out of his own pocket.  Then Little J asked where that money came from.  Not that it was any of his business, but the Preacher told him that it came from the various odd jobs he had worked and from his salary at the mission.  The mission is a non-profit organization that he has run for seventeen years.  Through the mission he provided food, clothing, emergency shelter, etc. to families in need in our area and around the country.  He did receive a salary from the mission, but rarely got one from the church because there just wasn’t enough money to pay him.

Little J then asked, “Well doesn’t all the money that the mission gets come from the church?”  That was laughable.  Seriously.  The church can barely pay its bills and he’s saying they’ve supported the mission for the past fifteen years?  OMGLOL  The Preacher didn’t know how to respond to such an outrageous claim so he just answered no.  When the Preacher told Little J that it was really none of his business where his money came from Little J had the gall to say that he had attended and supported the church for a month now and he believed that it was his business.  LOL  I don’t even know how to respond to that kind of absurdity.  Neither did the Preacher.

The Preacher and my mother have been very hurt by all of this and are still in a state of shock.  On the other hand, my sister and I are not shocked, we are just irritated.  Irritated because the people that we thought were friends have turned out to be just more of the same old conniving, control-seeking, lying types that have hurt our family too many times in the past.  And frankly, we’re not going to take it any more.

Our plan is to go to church on Sunday and see how we are received.  Since we are still only an hour away from the church and were told to come visit often, I’m curious to see how they react when we walk through those doors.  I also would like the opportunity to ask the new pastor, Momma’s Boy, to show me the proof of my father’s thievery.  I know he won’t have any, but I want to see him squirm.  At the very least he should be called out on his lies.  I’m not looking to start any trouble, only to have the truth come out.  He can’t slander someone’s name like that and expect to completely get away with it.  If the Preacher can’t be there to defend himself, then his daughters damn well will be there to do so.

Can I get an amen?

Goodnight & happy humping!

Moving on up! Praise the Lord!

We got the house!  Yay!  Yesterday we actually accomplished something.  Yesterday morning Little Bubba and I took an hour ride into town to cash a check.  He slept all the way there and all through the stop at the bank.  It wasn’t until after I stopped to grab us some lunch at Chik-fil-A that he woke up.  He wasn’t interested in eating his chicken nuggets, but he did find the sound of his own screaming to be entertaining.  It wasn’t screaming out of pain or discomfort.  He was just screaming for the fun of it and to try to drive me insane.  Yet another reason I’m happy not having kids of my own.

As soon as we got back home my sister called and said that we were taking the house that she found for rent, and she needed me to come immediately and meet her with the money.  So I loaded Little Bubba back up in the car and we went and met her and took the money and signed the lease.  My sister had already seen the place, but I had only seen the outside of it on Google maps.  It didn’t look that great from the outside, but I figured it had to be better than the place we’re in now.  Once we got the keys we drove over to take a look and turn on the air conditioning so that it would be nice & cool for when we start moving in.  I was pleasantly surprised by how it looks inside.  It’s kind of small, but at least it’s clean and there aren’t any leaks.  The place we’re in now has a major leak in the central A/C unit and it’s flooded her room and the kitchen.  Her carpet is soaked, the kitchen floor has bowed up, and there are tiny gnats everywhere because of all the water.  It’s disgusting.  That’s our main reason for being in such a rush to get out of here.

I’m not looking forward to packing up everything, but I sure will be glad to have a decent place to live in again.  When we were leaving the house to come back here my sister said something about it being smaller than she wanted.  All I could say was “Praise you Jesus! Thank you Jesus!  No more bugs!”  LOL  Oh, and thanks to the Preacher for making it all possible. Love ya daddy!

I’ll be without internet for the next week or so until we get our DSL installed.  I’ll be back writing as soon as it’s on though. 🙂

So until next time, happy humping!

I am a creation of my own Karma.

What goes around comes around.  Give and you shall receive.  Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

As she has planted, so does she harvest; such is the field of karma.  ~Sri Guru Granth Sahib

I am a Christian, but I also believe in Karma.  It’s probably difficult to believe that someone could believe in both, but I suppose I’m not your typical, well, anything.  I attended mostly pentecostal type churches since the age of twelve.  I’ve also tried out meditative yoga which helped me focus, relax and be a calmer person.

“In Buddhist teaching, the law of karma, says only this: `for every event that occurs, there will follow another event whose existence was caused by the first, and this second event will be pleasant or unpleasant according as its cause was skillful or unskillful.'” (The Law of Karma)

The sayings at the top each refer to Karma, but in different ways.  Sometimes I get depressed or just tired of how my life doesn’t seem to be going in the direction that I want it to go.  At those times my mind wanders back to things that I’ve done in my life that I’m not exactly proud of doing.  Some of the things that I’ve done I never even realized were wrong, bad, or hurtful to other people.  It’s not until I reflect back on them that I see the truth in what I have done.

I know I’ve hurt a lot of guys, and I regret most of it.  Of course there were some that I really don’t regret hurting because they probably deserved it for some reason.  I’m just unlamenting like that.  Unfortunately the ones that I do regret hurting, I really do feel bad about.  Like the nice older guy who went with me to the Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, bought me a t-shirt (which I’m wearing as I write this), paid for the tickets even though I had bought them originally, then gave me the sweetest goodnight kiss when he dropped me off at home.  The next day he sent me flowers and a card.  Inside the card he wrote that he had a wonderful time and was so happy that he was able to spend his birthday with me.  He never said anything the night before about it being his birthday.  I never spoke to him again.  To this day I can’t tell you why.  I guess either I was just being a heartless bitch at the time, or I was scared off.

There have been so many times that I have gone out with men and for some reason or other I just never went out with them again.  It was rarely because I didn’t like them or because I wasn’t attracted to them.  I’ve been the bad girl who never returns phone calls, who ignores emails and texts, who just doesn’t seem to give a shit about the other person’s feelings.  I wish I knew why.  As I’ve gotten older I’ve tried to stop doing that, but occasionally I find myself falling into old habits.

My point is that I believe that because of all the bitchy, cruel, mean, heartless ways that I’ve treated men in the past, my Karma is somewhat skewed toward the bad side.  That’s why I sometimes think that it’s the reason for my having gone through so many bad relationships, being cheated on, being lied to, and basically being treated the way that I treated others.

It may not help, but I would like to throw this out to the universe…I’m sorry.  I’m sorry for all the crappy things that I did to men and how I treated them when they definitely didn’t deserve it.  I vow from this moment on to be honest and if I don’t want to continue seeing someone, I will say so in the nicest way possible.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that this will help change my Karma for the better in some small way.

Happy humping!

Ask me anything – Part 1

I decided to go ahead and start answering some of the questions since they were so good, and if I answered them all at once it would be a very long post.  This has been a lot more fun than I thought it would be.  🙂  To ask me a question, you can go to my original post and fill out the form.  Here’s the first two.

Name: Nelson Rose

Blog Address: http://quest4light.wordpress.com

My first girlfriend was a preacher’s daughter.  She was by far the most free-spirited and kinkiest of all.  I’ve noticed there are only extremes when it comes to preacher’s kids though.  They are either dogmatic duplicates of their parents or totally wild and free-spirited.  Why is that?

This was the first response/question that I received and it’s a great one.  This is the stereotype that preacher’s kids have to deal with on an almost daily basis.  We (preacher’s kids) do tend to either go the full-blown religious routes like our parents, or due to the strictness of our upbringings, we take the darker path towards debauchery and disbelief.  I chose the latter.

This is just my opinion, but I think we (PKs) have such black & white views on things because we either bend or break from the pressure of having everyone judging us on a regular basis.  Many people think that preacher’s kids are supposed to be better, nicer, more spiritual and religious because they are surrounded by Godliness all the time.  That’s not true.  We see just as much wickedness, mostly from the people in our own churches.  Hypocrisy is rampant in the church.  I don’t say that lightly either.  It’s the honest to God truth.  I’ve never seen so much hypocrisy as I have in the church.  After years and years of seeing that it can make a person jaded and weary.

Second – when can we get a drunk and screw?  lol

Even though you cheated a little and asked two questions I’ll still answer.  🙂  I’m always up for a good time especially when it involves drunkenness and sex.

Name: singlewhitealcoholicseekssame

Blog Address: http://singlewhitealcoholicseekssame.wordpress.com

You mentioned once how annoyed you were when Skaterboi kept wanting to cum in your mouth.  Was this just a “not in the mood” thing, or are you opposed to swallowing in general?

It’s not that I don’t want a man to cum in my mouth, I’ve had men cum in my mouth before.  I have even swallowed before, many times.  (Oops, where’s the soap.  My mom would definitely have a stroke if she knew that.)  The problem with Skaterboi is that he ONLY wants to see himself cum.  He never wants to cum inside me, which I happen to prefer.  It all comes down to intimacy.  When I’m having sex with someone I want to know that there is a connection between us.  When he won’t look at me or cum inside me it makes me wonder what the hell he is really thinking about.  When he only wants to cum on me or in my mouth I feel like a rubber blow-up doll, just an object for him to use for his own pleasure.

When I’m having P in V sex and my partner and I both orgasm at the same time, that’s the most wonderful feeling in the world to me.  I can deal with a man cumming in my mouth every now and then, but not ALL of the time.

In a Blues Brothers State of Mind

This morning I woke up, in a Blues Brothers state of mind.  Sometimes, you just have to say, fuck it.  It’s Saturday and tomorrow is Easter Sunday.  I haven’t been able to go into the city because I’m afraid.  I found out that I’m a wanted woman, wanted by a man for something that I said and something that he did.  Being cooped up inside all the time like I usually am can drive a person insane.  I’ve cut all my hair off, dyed it black, and just stopped caring what people think of me.  The Preacher wanted me to come up to his church for service tomorrow, but I just don’t have the energy.

I got home yesterday after spending four days with my sister and nephew.  When I got home the sink was full of dirty dishes, the house was a mess, and Skaterboi was next door drinking beer with the landlord and some other people.  He hobbled back home saying that his foot was bothering him again.  He said it started hurting again that morning and that’s why he hadn’t done the dishes.  I asked if they were all from the night before.  I knew they weren’t.  He said no they weren’t.  So he had four days to do the dishes, but he didn’t.  I’m not obsessive about having the house spotlessly clean, but dirty dishes sitting in the sink for four days is just too much for me to handle.

I can’t wait to get my little motor home and hit the road.