Swinging with Santa

Now y’all already know that I’ve been on Plenty of Fish off and on for a while now.  During another fit of boredom yesterday evening I set my profile to unhidden.  As I was going through their “meet me” feature on my phone, consistently hitting the “No” button, someone caught my eye.  I paused for a minute before hitting the “No” button.  I’ll admit that the Santa hat and goofy smile sort of appealed to me.  Instead of hitting the “No” button, I clicked to view his profile.  He’s not too far away and is the same age as me.  He seemed cool, but I didn’t bother messaging him.  I did show the picture of him wearing the Santa hat to Manwhore just for fun.  His reaction?  “What a goofball.”  In which I replied, “But he’s a cute goofball.”

At about 6:30 pm I got a message from him. “Hey there. ****** here. Hope you had a great week.”  It was a nice short message so I replied, and then this morning I had a message from him which included his phone number.  We were texting back and forth all day and he emailed me about a dozen pictures.  Some of which were a little revealing so say the least.  Then he called me this afternoon and we had a nice little conversation.  Manwhore walked in just as I was hanging up the phone.

I walked out into the living room as he was coming through the door and he said, “What’s with the big goofy smile?”  I sort of giggled and said I didn’t know and then headed into the kitchen.  Then my phone dinged and it was another email from Santa.  Manwhore was standing behind me looking over my shoulder as I opened the attached picture.  I immediately covered the bottom half of the screen because I caught a quick glimpse of what the picture included.

MH: “What’s that? Let me see.”

So I showed him the picture, well, most of it.  He wasn’t satisfied with just that and took my phone so he could see the whole picture.

MH:  “Oh my God.”

Yeah, I was laughing and blushing at the same time at this point.

Me:  “Well, you said you wanted to see.”

I told him that the guy in the picture was the same one from the Santa cap picture.  Then Art came up in the conversation.  Yeah, I know I wasn’t going to talk about him anymore, but this is an exception to the rule.  I have to to tell the story.

MH:  “So who do you think is better looking?  Santa or Art?  And don’t go by how you feel about Art.  I’m just curious.”

Me:  “Ummm…well…to be honest Art is really handsome, but Santa is better looking…but….”

MH:  “See, I told you you would find someone else.  You’ve already met someone better looking.”

Me:  “But…but I really liked Art.  He was funny and smart and we had so much in common and…”

MH:  “But you will find someone even better.”

Me:  (Rolling my eyes in frustration.) “I know.”

MH:  “So what do you think of Witchy Poo?”

Me:  “I like her.  She’s really nice.  Why?”

MH:  “Good.  She likes you too.  She swings both ways too you know.”

Me:  “Really?  Wow.  Is everyone bisexual now?  I think Santa is bi too.  What the hell?”

My favorite quote of the day: “I may not be fresh, but I’m not stale either.” Me.


So that was my day.  How was yours? 🙂

Happy humping!

4 thoughts on “Swinging with Santa

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