Archive | February 22, 2012

Love & Sex Q&A #11

Love & Sex11

Have you ever felt that your involvement with your partner was more hard work than fun?  If so, do you feel this is to be expected or is a sign that something basic is wrong?

This is an appropriate question for me now.  Since I’ve been obsessing over Art so much lately, and it unfortunately reminds me of how I was with Manwhore in the beginning, this is something I really needed to explore.  I also haven’t answered any of these questions in a while and didn’t want you to think I had abandoned my little pink book. 🙂

I do sometimes feel that the relationships that I’m in or have been in are entirely too much work and not worth the effort.  I always wonder whether it’s a sign that the feelings I have for a person are not shared.  I wrote once about being the moth or the flame.  I still believe that that’s a great way of looking at it because if only one person in a relationship is the moth, then it’s probably not going to work out.  Unless both people are both the moth and the flame, meaning both are attracted to one another and both are drawing the other in, it’s just not going to last.

In all honesty though, that’s very difficult to find, or at least for me it has been.  Either men are really attracted to me, but I’m not that attracted to them, or vice versa.  It’s enough to drive a girl crazy sometimes.

My relationship with Art is still new and in the infant stage.  I am definitely the moth.  I know that much for sure.  It’s not that I am not physically attracted to a lot of men, because I am.  However, I am rarely attracted to a man to this degree not only physically, but mentally, emotionally, and creatively.

When I was with LL Cool Bean, I liked him because he was so nice and down to earth, but I just couldn’t reach that level of physical attraction that I need.  I also had a problem dealing with his immaturity, and because of that I had a hard time opening up to him emotionally.  I had the same problem with my ex-husband, the Ox.  He was intelligent and a good person, but it was like we were on different levels mentally.  The same can also be said for Bobblehead Nerd and Skaterboi.

On the other hand I have been with some guys who I found very attractive, but were either assholes, drunks or idiots such as BSL, EB, and Yankee Cowboy to list just a few.  In fact, after I broke with Yankee Cowboy and moved back down South I swore that I would never go out with a “pretty boy” again.  They were just too much trouble and upkeep.  I decided that average looking guys were what I needed.  I was wrong.

I know I tend to be shallow when it comes to what I find physically attractive, but I also try to look past the physical and see a person for who they are.  Unfortunately, that isn’t always enough.  It needs to be a package deal.  Art is the package deal.  I know that’s a bold statement to make so soon, but it’s obvious not only to me but to everyone around me.  Now if I can just figure out if I’m not just his moth, but also his flame.

I did decide to go with him to visit his kids this weekend.  If I can’t figure all this out by the end of our weekend together, then I really do have some serious issues going on.  LOL  Wish me luck!

Happy humping!

Sexy Blog Award

Sexy Blog Award

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Rules of the Sexy Blog Award

1. Post 5 sexy suggestions.

2. Post a link to your sexiest blog post.

3. Nominate 5 other sexy bloggers.

4. Let your nominees know they’re sexy.

5 Sexy Suggestions:

  1. On a week night when nothing is really going on and you have no plans, get all dolled up in a cute dress and just lounge around like it’s no big deal.  You’ll feel sexy and relaxed.  Plus it should only take about an hour for your  man to come over and start getting flirty and acting like a love-struck horn-dog.
  2. Smile.  Nothing is sexier than a happy smiling person.
  3. Guys like to be complimented too.  So don’t ignore the fact that he’s looking extremely hot today.  Let him know, and just watch his face light up.
  4. Give porn a chance.  Ladies, you might think that porn is degrading or just plain gross sometimes, but your man doesn’t think so.  If you really want to show him you care, then pop in a porn and watch it with him sometime. 😉
  5. Two words.  Oral sex.  There’s nothing sexier than a little 69 action or just blow jobs and eating out a girl.  Remember, give and you shall receive!  Sharing is caring!  LOL

My Sexiest Blog Post:

Embers of Love & Lust: Playing with Fire

5 Sexy Bloggers:

Snarky Snatch

Women are from Mars

therealcarriebradshaw101

Sex and the City (China)

singlewhitealcoholicseekssame

Thanks to vloves for the award!

Happy humping!