Adventures in Moving – Part 1

Yes, this is going to be a multi-part post, mainly because it’s taken over a week to write and turned out to be 3,000+ words.  Enjoy! 🙂

The moving week from hell doesn’t even begin to accurately describe this past week.  Last Friday my sister and I went and put the deposit down on the house that we’re renting.  We hadn’t planned on moving so soon and we didn’t have anything packed or ready to move.  We started packing that night and trying to get all the clothes washed.  The trailer that we were living in had a major leak in the central air conditioning unit and had flooded my sister’s bedroom and closet.  Because of all the flooding there were about a million little gnats that had moved in with us.  It was disgusting to say the least.  Also keep in mind that we are all still sick with this awful cold which has now turned into a nasty chest thing where we’re coughing up gobs of phlegm.  We’ve been through four boxes of Kleenex and counting.

My sister talked to her friend, Perv, with a pickup truck and he agreed to help us move the big stuff, mostly furniture, on Saturday.  At that point he was the only guy that was going to be there to help.  Perv is smitten with my sister and would probably do anything to get her to give him a chance.  It’s not going to happen though.  He has the mentality of a kid and she just isn’t interested.  Anyway she’s still seeing her old man, who by the way has four trucks and was nowhere to be found that day.  Perv had to do some bush-hogging first, but said he’d come over when he was done.  Yes, we live in the South.  Even worse we live in the rural South.  Rednecks abound here.  At least it isn’t hard to find someone with a truck though…very handy when moving.

When Saturday morning rolled around I had a text from EB.  He offered to come help us move.  Yay!  Finally! A man willing to help us out.  He had an hour drive so he didn’t get there until around 1:00 pm.  In the mean time my sister and I were packing and loading stuff into our cars to bring over.  We managed to get a load done before EB got there.

About 3:00 pm Perv showed up with two other guys who are also my sister’s friends.  They came in to take a look at what all needed to be moved first and Perv immediately sat down in the recliner.  He told my sister that he passed a kidney stone three days earlier and was still in a lot of pain.  My first thought was that he saw what had to be done and decided to weasel his way out of helping.  One of the other guys said that they would come back with a trailer so they could move more stuff and Perv needed to go lay down for a while.  Wow.  So they moved absolutely nothing and left.  So much for that plan.  They never showed back up by the way.

We continued moving as much as we could in the cars, but there was no way to move the beds and that was what we needed moved the most.  Neither one of us wanted to stay in the trailer another night with the flooding and bugs.  By the time 9:00 pm rolled around we were all so tired that we discussed just putting blankets on the floor and sleeping at the new place.  This would have been fine except that we discovered that our new place was infested with roaches.  I’m not talking about just a few little roaches either.  I’m talking about a full-blown in need of a nuclear grade pesticide bomb infestation.

My sister’s old man also decided to stop by the new place around 9:00 pm and bring us some alcohol.  Thank God for Canadian Mist and her old man, even if he was M.I.A. when it came to helping us move.

EB decided to go take a shower while we were sitting around drinking.  When he got out of the shower he informed us that we had no hot water.  The water heater is apparently gas.  Great.  We hadn’t had the gas turned on yet because we used most of our money just to rent the damn roach motel.  So it was cold showers for everyone.  Oh, wait.  Sorry, sis decided that she and Little Bubba needed to go over to her old man’s house for the night.  So my sweet little sister got to go take a hot shower and sleep in a nice comfy bed.  Bitch.

Somebody please call Billy the Exterminator!

As EB and I sat on layers of blankets on the floor talking about the roach situation I began to feel myself pushing closer to the edge of a mini-breakdown.  My stress level at that point was through the roof and I didn’t want to cry, but either the Canadian Mist or just the thought of having to take cold showers for the rest of the week was pushing me over the edge.  I sat contemplating whether or not to just go ahead have a good cry and let it all out, or to try to be strong in front of EB.  Then a roach crawled up on the blanket.  I knew then that if I wanted to get any sleep that night I wasn’t going to be able to do it there in the roach motel.  So before I burst into tears I told EB to get his stuff because we were going back to the trailer to sleep.  I knew that at least the only bugs there were gnats and they definitely weren’t in my room because it was on the opposite end of the trailer from my sister’s flooded room.  He was in total agreement so we left.

I wish I could say that it was the best night’s sleep I’ve ever had, because I was so extremely tired, but EB and I had to sleep in my twin bed and it was still a long restless night.  EB doesn’t require as much sleep as a normal human being so he was up and down a lot.  Still, it was better than waking up covered in roaches.

To be continued…

Happy humping!

8 thoughts on “Adventures in Moving – Part 1

  1. Oh dear..that sounds awful!

    I just hope that the next instalment gives you better luck and more help with your move.
    I shall wait with baited breath…

  2. And no roaches…can you get somebody to come and fumigate the cannot live in conditions like that!!

  3. Pingback: Adventures in Moving – Part 2 « Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

  4. OMG!!!! Roaches!!!

    I’d be all over that slumlords ass, and if he can’t get rid of them hire a VERY expensive good exterminator and make the slumlord take it off your rent, that is BULLSHIT!

    Good luck to you

  5. Pingback: Adventures in Moving – Part 3 « Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

  6. Pingback: Adventures in Moving – Part 4 (Fin) « Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

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