Ok, total confession time. I’m sitting her at 8:47 p.m. drunk on Red Stripes and high from the hit I just took. I’m horny and tired of hanging out outside around the grill talking to rednecks that are married and unobtainable. I need dick and I need it now. Damn you Manwhore. Damn you Skaterboi. Damn you every man who I’ve ever enjoyed fucking. This isn’t going to work. I can handle being single, but I cannot and will not handle going without sex.
Just overheard my sister say, “I don’t know where [PD] is, but if she’s got a beer and a cigarette, she’s happy.” LOLOLOL
You will be fine girl, go buy yourself a bitchin’ new vibrator, I know it’s not the same, but at least it doesn’t mouth off or cause you any grief…enjoy being single and free…life is good 🙂
Get a dildo or a hitachi magic wand. Being single can drive you crazy in moments like these, I can relate after the night I had.
Hang in there, young lady! Just don’t backslide and wind up in bed with one of your exes.
You have no idea how good that advice is, but also a little too late. I’ll make note of it for future reference though. 🙂
Hooray beer!!!
See, I’m rubbing off on you! 🙂
Yes the beer was very good, until the next day when the hangover kicked in. 😉