My Top 5 Threesomes

Frankly my dear, I don’t do threesomes anymore, but I do have a top five list.  I’ll try to put them in chronological order to be fair, but my memory is a little foggy for that time period so they may not be exactly in this order.  What?  You can’t believe that I’ve had enough threesomes to have a top five?

1.  Do, Re, Mi It’s a Threesome!

I described this one in an earlier post My Top 5 Most Memorable Sexual Encounters.  One Easter Sunday my gay/bi best friend and I were hanging out at the pool getting loaded and high and somehow ended up calling a friend of mine that I had been casually dating and we asked him to come over.  After going out to a girls & guys strip club we went back to the apartment and had a threesome.  I don’t consider it a full-fledged threesome only because I was not penetrated vaginally.  See I can use the proper terms sometimes.  That was my first male-male-female threesome.

2.  My First Female

My first female-male-female threesome was with a girlfriend of mine Barbie and her boyfriend Ken.  I had met her online and she finally asked me if I would like to hang out with them sometime.  One night I went over to Barbie & Ken’s apartment and we had a few drinks.  We immediately got down to the business of discussing what was about to happen between the three of us.  I won’t go into detail as it was pretty boring.  I would like to make it clear that I seemed to be the center of attention which was nice.

3.  The One That Shouldn’t Have Happened

This one is rather embarrassing.  I was hanging out with my friend Chiquita, a former stripper, and she decided that she wanted us to meet up with a male friend of hers.  I can’t remember his name for the life of me so I’ll call him Mr. Noname.  Chiquita, Mr. Noname and myself went to his house and they wanted to get in the hot tub outside.  Think Jersey Shore meets The Sopranos.  Once in the hot tub all hell broke loose and I found myself being led by Chiquita into this guy’s bedroom.  We had some decent sex.  She went down on me, then she went down on him, etc., etc.  It really wasn’t anything special except for it was her first threesome and my first with her.  We never saw him again or spoke of that night again.

4.  No He Didn’t! Oh Yes He Did!

This is probably one of my favorites because it’s just too damn funny.  My friend Barbie (see #2) and I were at her place just hanging out drinking and having some laughs one night when there was a knock at the door.  It was a guy that she sort of knew…well, not really.  He was a friend of a friend.  She invited him in and once again there was alcohol involved so it’s sort of a blur about how we ended up in the bedroom.  Once in the bedroom she decided to tie him to the bed, I assume so he couldn’t try anything weird.  We proceeded to tease and take advantage of the fact that we had a hot & very willing guy tied to her bed.  Eventually though we had to untie him because there’s only so much you can do when a guy is tied up.  So I ended up laying on the bed with her on top of me and him behind her.

This is where it gets good.  He’s doing her doggy-style and his cell phone rings.  The dumbass answers it!  Then he proceeded to have a conversation with one of his friends.  “Hey.  Yeah, I’m just here fucking these two chicks.  I’ll be over later.  Yeah, I’m fucking one of them now….”  And the conversation went on for about ten minutes.  By the time he hung up Barbie and I were laughing so hard we just couldn’t go on so we handed him his clothes and led him to the door.  He left confused and with deep blue balls.  Hey, he was lucky to have gotten as far as he did in the first place.  LOL

5.  My Last & Best

This is one of my favorites too because it involved two bi-sexual men.  I’d rather have two men than a man and a woman.  Probably because more attention gets paid to me.  I’m a selfish bitch sometimes.  So I’m in another state visiting my friend, Buck, and I’ve been there almost a week when he asks if I’d like him to invite a friend over for some fun.  I completely adored Buck, and we had already had some great sex, so I happily said yes.  Once his friend got there we started messing around kissing and then Buck brought out his strap-on.  Woo hoo!  Or at least that’s what I was thinking.  I’d never used one before and I assumed it was for me to use on him and I was right.  So while I was using the strap-on on Buck he was sucking his friend off.  We played musical chairs a few times and at one point I was laying down getting fucked by his friend and sucking Buck off.  It was awesome.  I really can’t find anything that was wrong with that one.  It was fun, exciting, sexy, and still to this day makes me horny just thinking about it.

So that’s it.  That’s my top five threesomes.  It’s been a very long time since I had a threesome and I did have some that turned out to have unpleasant consequences, such as a boyfriend asking me out behind the girlfriend’s back, that sort of thing.  It just gets messy if you’re not sure about the people who you’re having the threesome with.

Have you ever had a threesome?  If so, was it worth it?

17 thoughts on “My Top 5 Threesomes

  1. Not sure if I am envious or shocked by your revelations. I can’t be shocked cos I am a very broad minded old person so it must be envy.
    Well I never!

    love P

  2. Pingback: Threesomes galore! | Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

    • Yes I understand. I do use protection. And it’s been many years since I was with a bisexual man. Also the risk for stds is just as great with straight men.

  3. Pingback: Living the dream | Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

  4. Pingback: 2015: The Year of Bliss Attacks | Confessions of a Preacher's Daughter

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